7-20-12, Aurora

21 07 2012

I’ve been examining my feelings about the Aurora massacre all day long.  The tragedy happened about 2.5 miles northwest of me, almost precisely half as far away as I was from the Alfred P. Murrah building when Timothy McVeigh blew it up.  I’m not comparing the two.  I was a responder at the OKC event, and I know from personal experience that it was of a different order of magnitude compared to the event at the movie theater here in Aurora, CO.

But I feel almost exactly the same.  There is this horrible sadness.  Even though I didn’t lose any loved ones at that theater, I feel this sense of loss.  I know what the family members of people who were killed have lost.  I know what the people who were injured have lost.  What have I lost?  Why do I feel this way?

I remember about five months after the OKC bombing I was at the State Fair.  In a particular building they were displaying these panels which had come from all over the country, and upon which people had written messages to express their love and concern for us in Oklahoma after the event.  I remember that I started crying.  Just out of nowhere tears were coming down my cheeks, because I had totally blocked the bombing from my mind over those scant few months.

I was born in Oklahoma…raised in Colorado…spent most of my adult life in Oklahoma…moved back to Colorado.  I’ve had my heart broken in both states.

And I love them both dearly.  I sincerely pray for God’s “peace that surpasses all understanding” for the people and the families devastated by this tragedy in this–my current home town–Aurora, Colorado.  I can tell you from experience, those who have suffered in this tragedy…

There is an end to every nightmare.

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